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Secret Satan 2018 - Gifts Received Thread

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14 Dec 2018 18:48 #288183 by stormseeker75
As the almighty Michael Barnes has decreed, post your ill-gotten goods here!
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14 Dec 2018 18:56 - 15 Dec 2018 20:52 #288186 by stormseeker75
My package came yesterday!

Here's Powder sniffing the box. Surely it contains terrible things!
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467169/stormseeker75

A nice note from Old Scratch!
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467170/stormseeker75


Where the hell did you send this from that it cost $22????

Here's layer one:
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467171/stormseeker75


Does Satan own a grain mill in Canada?

Under that is some actual games. Oddly, I don't have regular Catan so happy to have that one. I am famously quoted as saying "Martin Wallace can suck my balls" after playing God's Playground, so Satan knows how to rub salt in the wounds.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467172/stormseeker75


Another layer, and more games! Curious about XCOM. I've always wanted to host a murder mystery.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467173/stormseeker75


More games under that! Plus some Hot Wheels cars for Gaslands.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467174/stormseeker75


A bag of armor bits and weapons for Gaslands! I needed more of this stuff.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467177/stormseeker75


The true spirit of Secret Satan: Sending an expansion for a game you don't have and couldn't get if you wanted to. Dick move, Morningstar!
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467178/stormseeker75


When 3D printing goes awry. I'll use this for a sweet piece of Gaslands scenery.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467179/stormseeker75


Here's a better shot of all the Hot Wheels cars in the box. There's some great stuff in here, especially the monster trucks.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467181/stormseeker75


Last, but not least, Leviathans? There were some boards as well. I have a friend who's into steampunk that will love these.
boardgamegeek.com/image/4467180/stormseeker75


How the flying flip do I get this thing to show actual pictures?
Last edit: 15 Dec 2018 20:52 by ChristopherMD.
The following user(s) said Thank You: jur, allismom3, Dr. Mabuse, rocketkiwi, lj1983, the_jake_1973, WadeMonnig

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14 Dec 2018 19:16 #288190 by rocketkiwi
The box arrived. The box was large. With a trusty pair of scissors in hand, I set to work. Work would be the theme this year. Upon the successful opening of the package I was greeted by a letter on top of a Plano box. This Plano box, specifically.



The note was simple, word-processed. My fate was determined, it read, long before my name was given form. I make my wage listing items for sale on eBay, and as such I am no stranger to what lurked in this package - the INFERNAL MANUFACTURINGS OF GAMES WORKSHOP.



No! I am free of their hold! They are but what puts food on my table and gasoline in my car! You will not control me, Satan!



The gate to Hell is nicely painted.
The following user(s) said Thank You: jur, Rliyen, allismom3, lj1983, GorillaGrody, WadeMonnig

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15 Dec 2018 13:00 #288244 by Secret Satan

stormseeker75 wrote: boardgamegeek.com/image/4467170/fuckyou

Too lazy to post pictures here? Sloth!

rocketkiwi wrote: The gate to Hell is nicely painted.

But not with good intentions.

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15 Dec 2018 13:05 #288246 by Black Barney
This is the most intimidating thread on the whole site

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15 Dec 2018 14:52 - 15 Dec 2018 15:45 #288251 by WadeMonnig
Lo and Behold, Satan had a package delivered to my house. You can tell because, as they say, the devil is in the doodle


So, let's look into the abyss shall we?


Is that bubble wrap or the tears streaming down my face from the mixture of joy and brimstone?


Seriously, Satan must have worked a deal with Alexa and/or Facebook because this is literally the game I have been talking
about getting for the last few weeks. All hail his all seeing/all knowing presence.


I love the name of this game, kudos to the pun devil/overlord


Satan knows you are lonely, so he sends expansions so that the game plays itself...Cruel but fair.


Played a quick game of "This Town isn't big enough for the 2-4 of us" with the wife since she wasn't quite up for a Martin Wallace deep dive when I have not read the rules yet.


And, as is the Secret Satan Tradition, I burned the games after each play...wait, what? That's not the tradition? Son of a....



Edit: Fuck me, I can't get those images to appear inline.
Last edit: 15 Dec 2018 15:45 by WadeMonnig.
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15 Dec 2018 14:58 #288252 by Disgustipater
I aint about to spend all that time clicking all these links...
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15 Dec 2018 15:01 #288253 by WadeMonnig

Disgustipater wrote: I aint about to spend all that time clicking all these links...


Agreed but to quote stormseeker how the flying flip do you get the images to appear?

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15 Dec 2018 15:14 - 15 Dec 2018 15:16 #288254 by rocketkiwi
For imgur links, put i. in front of imgur and .jpg after the end. So
https://imgur.com/Pq37WS3
becomes
https://i.imgur.com/Pq37WS3.jpg
Last edit: 15 Dec 2018 15:16 by rocketkiwi.
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15 Dec 2018 15:52 #288255 by drewcula
I received a SS box today. I refuse to open it until Xmas.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Rliyen, Black Barney, lj1983, Deleted, WadeMonnig

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15 Dec 2018 18:24 #288263 by stormseeker75
What if you're not using imgur? Ain't nobody got time for that.

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15 Dec 2018 18:39 #288266 by ubarose
Under the message box, is a button that says add file. Click on it. A window showing you the files on your computer will open up. Navigate to the picture you want to upload. Click it. Click the choose button.

After the file uploads, an insert button will appear next to the Add File button. Position your cursor where you want the picture to appear and click insert.

Also, another Add File box will appear. So you can upload and insert the nest picture.

TLDR - Add File, then Insert
The following user(s) said Thank You: Rliyen, CranBerries, rocketkiwi, stormseeker75, WadeMonnig

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19 Dec 2018 01:12 - 19 Dec 2018 07:40 #288432 by blatz
Got a mysterious package today from one BL Zebub. After readying the altar and performing the required sacrifices I gleefully began releasing the unknown evil from its vessel.


First thing to be revealed: some sort of miniature tank. What could it mean, my dark lord?




Next, a computer game manual....from 1996. Well played, Satan. Well fucking played.




A weird ass sticker and some comics:






Holy. Shit. Now the real evil has shown itself. A belt holster for a six pack of beer. The enemy’s birthday celebration has now been made more tolerable.




Finally, a copy of The Mind. I’ve been wanting this for a while. I think my family will really enjoy this one. Thanks Satan!
Last edit: 19 Dec 2018 07:40 by blatz.
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19 Dec 2018 02:53 #288434 by Forelle
A brown box arrived and was left orphaned on the front step of my house, today. I should have immediately dropped kicked that thing to the curb, but no, I'm a kindhearted sucker and took that orphan in.

Upon opening the box, I was greeted by a rubber, pop-eyed devil and a postcard with a cute puppy that says "I clogged your toilet." On the back of the postcard is a message from ol' Scratch informing me that I suck and that he's gifting me with "garbage." This is known as foreshadowing.

After digging through packing material consisting of brown paper and trash bags (I'll come back to those), I find my first piece of joy: a bundle of punched out sheets from some game, which I'm guessing is Gloomhaven based on the note on the back of another postcard from Satan that is attached to said bundle.





Next up is Hope City:





This is a game I've never heard of, but which I have since looked up to learn is a game that was kickstarted into existence by 172 people. Only 73, however, will admit to owning it on BGG.

Digging a bit deeper brings me to a copy of Bloodsuckers, which looks like it has previously been opened and then badly re-shrinkwrapped.





Finally, at the bottom of this well of despair is Warhammer 40K Dark Millennium, a supplement to something I neither own or play:





As a bonus, there appears to be something growing on the inside of the box:





Satan, you may think you provided me with nothing but worthless garbage, but you're wrong. You did provide me something useful:





Until next year, Satan, until next year...
The following user(s) said Thank You: allismom3, drewcula

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19 Dec 2018 08:33 #288444 by Deleted
This is what I should have done last year. I tried SOO hard to get Jur!
The following user(s) said Thank You: Rliyen, allismom3, CranBerries

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