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Spiel des Jahres 2018 Nominees

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21 May 2018 09:41 #273785 by Black Barney
Great advice Shell, thanks !

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21 May 2018 09:55 #273790 by Sagrilarus

Shellhead wrote: It sounds like you should look into co-op games, for the sake of someone who doesn't enjoy direct competitive games.


Depending on the age, I think it's important that you don't rely solely on co-op games to deal with this issue. Kids need to learn to lose at some level, and how to take lessons from the loss to improve themselves at a later date. Much of this involves how you approach the games you play, before during and after. If you had the same issue in your youth you may be telegraphing to your daughter without realizing it. Kids need to learn that they aren't going to get the best grade in the class every time.

That said, which one of you was Stitch? That's the much better pull for Infinity.

S.
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21 May 2018 10:16 #273792 by Black Barney
She’s Stitch. I wanted someone that can fly. I thought I had stranded her on an abandoned bridge at one point but she cleverly summoned a helicopter to fly herself out of there

Yeah learning to lose is super important. I eventually did and always take losses as a learning opportunity now. In fact it’s one of the only ways to get better. We talk after every loss and hopefully she’ll come around like I did. If I hadn’t taken all those brutal beats as a kid, I don’t think I would have become the strong competitor I ended up being.

She’s 7 now. I think she’s old enough to learn that winning isn’t the point of playing games, it’s just to have fun. Not sure how to instill that value though... especially when even I have trouble believing it, lol

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21 May 2018 11:27 #273800 by Gary Sax

Shellhead wrote: Barney, your situation reminds me of a a couple that used to play Jyhad. The guy taught his girlfriend how to play and helped her design some decks. The game is very complex and cutthroat, with each player trying to eliminate the player on their left. The girlfriend was very competitive, and took it very personally when she lost. Since it was a multi-player game and she was an average player, that meant that she usually lost. On a couple of occasions, she got so frustrated that she started crying during the game. I didn't like her, but I felt bad for someone who could be so miserable while playing a game.


This is my partner, but without the crying, just intense anger. The good part is that she knows it about herself, so she doesn't play competitive games as a general rule.

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21 May 2018 11:35 #273804 by Shellhead

Gary Sax wrote:

Shellhead wrote: Barney, your situation reminds me of a a couple that used to play Jyhad. The guy taught his girlfriend how to play and helped her design some decks. The game is very complex and cutthroat, with each player trying to eliminate the player on their left. The girlfriend was very competitive, and took it very personally when she lost. Since it was a multi-player game and she was an average player, that meant that she usually lost. On a couple of occasions, she got so frustrated that she started crying during the game. I didn't like her, but I felt bad for someone who could be so miserable while playing a game.


This is my partner, but without the crying, just intense anger. The good part is that she knows it about herself, so she doesn't play competitive games as a general rule.


My girlfriend doesn't like to play boardgames. She is very competitive and doesn't like to lose, and assumes that she won't win against me because I play so many boardgames. Last year, I discovered that she even ruins a co-op game by ignoring teamwork and trying to treat it as just another competitive game.
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