Michael Barnes Proudly Presents TWBG’s Secret Satan 2018

Sign me up. Does it require a blood sacrifice? Reminds me of a song my buddy used to sing when referring to Death Metal. "Killyourmother,rapeyourfather,cutoffyourd*ck and give it to Sssssaaaannntaaaaaa.

All Signed Up, and ready to go

*Places quarters on the edge of the screen*

Don't think the second year could be as great as the first but only one way to find out.

Request that Satan include the forum user name of the person assigned so we can get the proper punishment for the sinner.

COMP-U-TRON provides this kind of reporting already. It does not need you to tell it to do so.

Come on folks, get in on this. We have a good turnout but the more the malevolenter.

Not only has the Canada Post strike caused a massive backlog of packages, I’m sure any container I bundle in would be seized by the DEA. My secret Satan would be some weird Mountie/FBI hybrid at my door asking about my rice crispy squares

I am ready to be someone’s secret stain this year! Or Satan, or maybe both. It is after all better to give than receive, just like with opinions, “feedback”, and diseases of the bathing suit area.

Hurry your ass up, Satan. I've got some fun stuff to send to some sucker.

COMP-U-TRON is working, there are new algorithms to find your perfect hellhole mate. Some of these proprietary analytics include but are not limited:

- likelihood to wear a fanny pack
- preferred Hawaiian shirt pattern
- Bearded/not beared (with subalgorithm for “chili-crusted” and “non-chili-crusted”)
- Dollar amount spent on Kickstarter games in FY2018.
- Cosmic Encounter opinion
- Has user sent peanut butter longjohns in the past (binary yes/no)
- Overall level of fealty to Games Workshop, TWBG’s corporate overlords

Stand by.

-10%
-All of them
-Bearded* (non-chili)
-$120
-Sucks Balls
-No
-Would steal, but not kill a baby for them

*looks like a middle schooler's attempt

- likelihood to wear a fanny pack
Only if there is no other place to put my gun

- preferred Hawaiian shirt pattern
Any that Tom Selleck wore circa Magnum PI

- Bearded/not beared (with subalgorithm for “chili-crusted” and “non-chili-
crusted”)
Beard, Clean Beard

- Dollar amount spent on Kickstarter games in FY2018.
80$ on roll and write games.

- Cosmic Encounter opinion
It's like shagging your bestie with a barbed wire condom.

- Has user sent peanut butter longjohns in the past (binary yes/no)
No, but I know who has

- Overall level of fealty to Games Workshop, TWBG’s corporate overlords
0.001% (the Space Hulk percent)

SuperflyTNT wrote: - Cosmic Encounter opinion
It's like shagging your bestie with a barbed wire condom.

Is this a pro or a con?

stormseeker75 wrote:

SuperflyTNT wrote: - Cosmic Encounter opinion
It's like shagging your bestie with a barbed wire condom.

Is this a pro or a con?

You have to be a pro to do it, and if you do it, you'll end up a con.

Da Bid Dabid wrote: -Bearded* (non-chili)

*looks like a middle schooler's attempt

I can verify this.

With the name and the time taken to get results, I am convinced Barnes has been keeping COMP-U-TRON going in his basement since the 70s.